Prayers of the Faithful for a Catholic Funeral, with Examples

At some point in planning a funeral Mass, someone from the parish will ask the family whether they want to write the prayers of the faithful. Many families have never noticed these prayers before, let alone written them, and they are asked at the worst possible week. They are short and follow a familiar pattern, and nobody expects them to be eloquent.

This guide explains what the prayers are, where they come in the Mass, and how to put a set together. At the end are three complete sets you can use as written or adapt, one general, one for a parent or grandparent, and one for a death that came without warning.

What the prayers of the faithful are

The prayers of the faithful are a series of short requests, called intentions or petitions, that the whole congregation offers to God together. The Mass calls this part the Universal Prayer. At an ordinary Sunday Mass it covers the needs of the Church, the world, people who are suffering, and the local community. At a funeral those same needs are still there, but the prayer turns toward the person who has died and the people who are grieving.

It helps to remember who the prayers are addressed to. They are not spoken to the congregation and they are not about the congregation. They are requests to God, made on behalf of the deceased and everyone else in need, and the people in the pews make each one their own by answering it.

Where they come in the funeral Mass

The prayers of the faithful close the Liturgy of the Word. The order runs like this: the readings and the Gospel, the homily, a short silence, and then the prayers of the faithful. Right after them the gifts are brought to the altar and the Liturgy of the Eucharist begins. If you are new to the shape of the whole service, our guide to what to expect at a Catholic funeral walks through it from the reception of the body to the final commendation.

A funeral liturgy outside Mass and the vigil service (the wake) also include intercessions in the same spirit, and the same petitions often work for both with small changes. See our guide to the vigil and committal for how those services run.

The usual structure

The priest or deacon begins with a short invitation to pray and ends with a concluding prayer. The family does not write either of those. What the family provides is the middle: usually five to seven petitions, said one at a time by a reader. A typical order looks like this:

• The Church, that it may hold on to the hope of the resurrection.
• The world, its leaders, and peace.
• The person who has died, by name, that God will welcome them into eternal life. This one is the heart of the set.
• The family and close friends, that they will be comforted.
• Those who cared for the deceased: nurses, hospice staff, caregivers, neighbors.
• All the faithful departed, often naming family members who died earlier.
• The people gathered at the Mass, that they may one day be reunited.

You do not need every line. Five well-chosen petitions are better than nine. The Church does ask that the prayer keep a wide view, so even at a funeral it is usual to include at least one petition for the Church or the world, not only for the family.

Each petition has the same shape: who you are praying for, what you are asking for them, and a closing cue. "For N.'s grandchildren, that they may carry his love for the outdoors and his faith into their own lives. We pray to the Lord." The congregation then answers, "Lord, hear our prayer." Some parishes use a different response, or a sung one. Ask whoever is coordinating the liturgy, and print it in the program if it is anything other than the usual.

Who reads them, and how long they take

The petitions can be read by a deacon if one is serving, or by a lector, or by a family member or friend. Families often choose a grandchild, a niece or nephew, or a close friend who is not already reading Scripture. The reader usually stands at the ambo, the same place the readings were proclaimed from.

A full set takes about two minutes. Keep each petition to one or two sentences. Type them out in a large font, double spaced, and give the reader a copy before the Mass so they are not reading them cold. If the reader may struggle to get through a petition that names their own grandmother, it is fine to give the most personal lines to someone steadier.

Making them personal without writing a eulogy

The most common mistake is turning the petitions into a series of tributes. "For Mom, who always made the best pie and never missed a ball game" is a lovely sentence, but it is a memory spoken to the room rather than a request to God. A petition needs something to ask for.

A few ways to keep the personal detail while keeping it a prayer:

• Use the detail as the reason, not the point. "For N., who welcomed everyone at her kitchen table, that she may be welcomed at the table of the Lord" names something true about her and then asks for something.
• Name the right people. Spouse, children, grandchildren, the friend who drove her to every appointment. Specific names make a petition feel personal faster than adjectives do.
• Pray for the hard parts. If the death followed a long illness, an addiction, or an estrangement, a quiet petition for healing and peace can say what the family cannot say aloud anywhere else.
• Save the stories. The homily is the priest's, and many parishes allow brief words of remembrance by a family member near the end of the Mass. That is where the pie and the ball games belong. Our guide to writing words of remembrance covers what parishes usually permit.

Many parishes hand families a sheet of sample petitions drawn from the ritual book, and you are free to pick from those rather than writing your own. Some parishes prefer it. If you do write your own, send them to the parish a few days ahead in case the priest wants to adjust anything.

Example set 1: a general funeral

Replace N. with the person's first name, and adjust "he" or "she" throughout.

• For the Church throughout the world, that she may hold fast to the hope of the resurrection and bring that hope to everyone who mourns. We pray to the Lord.
• For our country and all who govern it, that they may work for peace and protect every human life. We pray to the Lord.
• For N., who was given new life in Baptism, that God may forgive whatever was lacking and bring him into the joy of heaven. We pray to the Lord.
• For N.'s family, especially [names], that God may comfort them in their sorrow and surround them with the support of friends in the weeks ahead. We pray to the Lord.
• For everyone who cared for N. in his final days, that God may reward their kindness. We pray to the Lord.
• For our relatives and friends who have died before us, especially [names], that they may rest in God's peace. We pray to the Lord.
• For all of us gathered here, that our faith may give us strength, and that we may one day be together again in our Father's house. We pray to the Lord.

Example set 2: a parent or grandparent

• For the Church, that she may always be a home for families and a comfort to the grieving. We pray to the Lord.
• For N., who gave life to our family and taught us our first prayers, that God may receive her with the same love she gave to us. We pray to the Lord.
• For [spouse's name], who shared [number] years of marriage with her, that he may know the nearness of God and of his family in his loneliness. We pray to the Lord.
• For her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, that what she taught them about faith and kindness may live on in them. We pray to the Lord.
• For those who cared for her as she grew older, that God may bless the patience and gentleness they showed her. We pray to the Lord.
• For all the elderly who are lonely, sick, or near death, that they may never feel forgotten. We pray to the Lord.
• For the members of our family who have gone before her, especially [names], that they may welcome her home. We pray to the Lord.

If you are also choosing the readings, our guides to readings for a mother, readings for a father, and readings for a grandparent may help.

Example set 3: an unexpected death

When a death is sudden, families often feel the petitions have to explain what happened. They do not. Keep the details out and let the prayer carry the shock and the questions.

• For the Church, that she may stand beside all who suffer sudden loss and help them find their way to hope. We pray to the Lord.
• For N., taken from us without warning, that the Lord who knows every heart may receive him in mercy and give him peace. We pray to the Lord.
• For N.'s family and friends, who had no chance to say goodbye, that God may hold them up in their grief and send them people who will stay close. We pray to the Lord.
• For anyone here who carries guilt, anger, or unanswered questions, that God may give them the grace to let go of what they cannot change. We pray to the Lord.
• For the first responders, doctors, and nurses who tried to help, that God may strengthen them in their difficult work. We pray to the Lord.
• For all who have died suddenly or alone, that they may find a welcome in God's house. We pray to the Lord.
• For all of us, that we may treat one another with love while we have time, and live ready to meet the Lord. We pray to the Lord.

Leave out the first responders line if it does not fit the circumstances. For a death by suicide or overdose, the general wording above is enough, and your priest can help if you want something more specific. There is more on this in our guide to readings for a sudden death.

Putting it together

Whether the petitions get printed in the program depends on the parish. Most families print only the response, or nothing at all, since the congregation just listens and answers. The person who reads them does need a clean copy, though. The funeral program builder lays out the order of the Mass, the readings, and the hymns, and when you personalize a program it has a step for the petitions and prints them on a large-type reader's sheet along with the readings.

For the rest of the planning, see how to plan a Catholic funeral, choosing funeral readings, and choosing funeral hymns.